They say turning 44 brings ‘dramatic change’. I can’t wait

Youth sometimes feels like a party I went to but was too anxious to actually enjoy. There’s proof I was there, both in photographs and the long, yellow fact of time, but my only memory of it exists as a kind of glanced reflection, or the fleeting smell of perfume. Inspecting the creases beside my eyes I had the weary thought that I should be revelling in this relative youth today, as next year I would no doubt look back at this person with some sad wonder.