In 2026, it is possible to cover your body in science. You can put on probiotic leggings and a patented bra, and then you can apply lipstick containing hyaluronic acids “with differentiated molecular weights” and slather your face in a “triple-lipid peptide cream” developed by self-identified “skintellectuals.” You can also eat your science, by way of “clinically-studied key herbs, adaptogens, and minerals—at amounts informed by research.” If you get thirsty, you can have water that has been chemically manipulated with extra hydrogen atoms, just in case two aren’t enough for you. Even decades-old products have been newly recast as miracles of modern chemistry: After years of selling itself purely impressionistically, via close-up shots of hot athletes dripping sweat and swilling neon liquid, Gatorade has recently begun touting itself as “Lab Tested.” As the wellness movement collides with the supercharged demands of selling products in a crowded market, science-speak seems to have invaded every crevice of the fashion, beauty, and food industries.