It’s an experience many of us with so-called hyper-independence will recognise. I’ve behaved in similar ways, from more serious situations (I too have shouldered care responsibilities) to ridiculous ones, such as moving house alone, and the time I bought some weightlifting equipment then realised I wasn’t strong enough to carry it home. For most of my life, I’ve prided myself on my hyper-independent lone-wolf status – not relying on anyone but myself. But in recent years, I’ve come to see it not as a sign of my superior capabilities, but fuelled by fear of burdening others with my requests – or worse, being rejected – or of losing control.